Not gonna lie I wasn’t as into this one as I was expecting and while I do have more in my head for where this could go, I ended up stopping here for a minute and didn’t pick it back up before the day was out.
“Son of….I’ll kill you, you piece of crap!!”
Hitting the helium tank with my fist proved to be much more disastrous to me than the tank and it did nothing to dull my frustration.
I took a deep breath and tried again to slip the latex asshole over the helium spigot. For a moment there was sweet relief as the balloon stated to inflate and then I shifted my fingers just enough to send the latex bastard straight into my eye. If only my aim was that good when it came to anything else.
In the twenty minutes since my supervisor had sent me back here I had inflated ten balloons, chafed my already dry fingers, been hit at least twenty five times by balloons that had yet to be recovered and had not learned my lesson after three separate punches to the helium tank. All in all a lot of work for ten balloons that would delight children for thirty seconds and then become nothing more than a nuisance for their parents.
“Take a summer job. It’ll be good for you. Meet new people, make new friends. Get yourself out there.” All my mom’s prodding was missing from the army recuitment poster was ‘see exciting new places.’
I tried and failed to blow up another balloon. I looked back at the pitiful few I had done, partially to make sure they hadn’t escaped, partially to see if they had somehow managed to multiply. Still ten. My supervisor hadn’t given me a number to inflate or a time frame but I could pretty much assume I was short on both.
I looked toward the door and like I had everyday since I started working here, I debated between being angry, that my supervisor gave up trying to pronounce my name on the first day or amused that I had been reduced to a single letter like a Men in Black agent.
“What is taking so long?” my supervisor asked.
“I can’t be sure. Either I am really bad this or the balloons have organized and decided to launch a counterattack.”
As always, my tremendous wit fell flat.
“Well we need help on register I can send someone else back here when we are not so busy. Next time if you are unable to complete a task so so instead of wasting time and supplies.”
After my fight with the balloons my day only got worse. The balloons and grocery store patrons combined forces.
“Oh young man could you please help me with these?”
I looked down to see several packages of helium baloons coming across the register. They were the foil ones, also known as the Generals to the latex soldiers in the back.